Questions and Answers to Life and Everything

random thoughts and experiences

My Photo
Location: United States

daughter, mother, wife, big ole perv, ecclectic, vibrant, insatiably curious

Saturday, April 28, 2007

the household

As of this week the Zig house official has a teenager.

Multiple thoughts run through my bloldish head. Most of them not pretty.

I am not looking forward to hormones, atttitudes, driving, first dates.

I think these matters are goin to require carefull negotiations. Our first teenager is a boy. I dont think the rules for boys and girls change much. Not everyone agrees. I can already see The Princess carefully calculating... "but HE got to!". Unfortunatly for her I am not so easily swayed. Different kids, different circumstances.

I am however looking for high school and college graduations! I want my life back.

I have assisted or been raising kids for as long as I can remember. I want to play. WITH THE BIG TOYS!

My first step is going to be 27 next week. WOW!. I clearly remember a very shy big kid who needed lots of love, attention and help. He was a fairly easy teenager. He has grown into a fine young man. I am so proud of him.

My other thoughts race back to my teen years. enough said.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

drunk dialing

Drunk dialing is a camp favorite. It is just a favorite game we have also done it from home. I love drunk dialing so much.... that some friends have changed their phone numbers. Their bad. I told him I was going to. So dont bitch that its 3 am "your" time and you have roommate that wants good shut eye before the big shoot tomorrow. You were warned.

So I am at work last week and the phone rings. I am delighted to report I was drunk dialed at work from an out of town coworker . Funniest damn thing. Her all giggling, telling me about her day in no particular order. My favortie part though was this description of the events of that evening with a new gentleman type friend......

"All the cobwebs are knocked out now!"

ROFLMAO. She was soooo proud. I was so happy for her. I mean come on, I am happy for anyone getting them selves a little something something as long as its on the up and up. Or sideways sideways. or upside down.

I love my job. I love my co workers even more. I am going to miss nights.

Monday, April 23, 2007

All HAIL the Crown Prince OF DORK ZIGZAGMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WE WON!....

I mean HE WON!.

I am pleased with the campaign. It was hard work but connecting with the people was well worth it. I am sure there are many relieved people.
Relieved from my incessant badgering to go vote... go vote ZIG!...:)
There was the chat people, and the mass emails, and the phone calls and the work people and well just about everyone else too. SOme people even got smart started voting before I could get to them. Kudos for those "I already voted" peeps. I know who you are.

All that is left now is drinking the chilled champagne and collecting my Campaign Manager fees. I believe my white light, mind numbing, tremor inducing total satisfaction will be well worth the week of watching the polls (seriously you have no idea how often I checked for rougue runaway candidates) and reminders to vote and some gentle arm twisting.

I must say My First Crown Prince of Dork is about the handsomest Dork I ever saw.
After some 20+ years since we met... He still makes my heart flutter. I still get excited knowing he is home when I drive home from work. I love and lust him. Its just now I get to say things like... "your a dork" and have proof!

Prince of Dorks... or Princess of Dorks......

This is a Sticky note... and will remain at the top of my page until Zig wins victoriously or hangs his head in shame.... of course you help victory (and my quest to forever torment him as a Crowned Prince Of Dorks) by follow the link on "vote" below to the polling page.

Newer posts below, thanks for stopping by!

If you are so inclined, please read Zigs submission and then VOTE.

The Fabulous people at Dorkblogger have come up with a contest complete with stories submitted by would be Prince or Princess of Dorkdom and polling.

I of course know I am married to the best looking Dork ever. I mean come on....

case in point..... Once we were out with our favorite roadie. (I know you hate that dollface but shush its my story) Zig in all his wisdom and dorkiness hands Sffade a flask of Courvoisier(while sitting in the bar) and I quote "to sniff"... except he forgot to tell Sffade this. Poor Sffade took a huge quaggle to sample then looked around with tears in his eyes for a place to spit it out before finally choking it down. We should note in the Zig house we like Courvoisier...WITH a coke chaser. Sffade was sitting in front of single malt scotch. NO MIXER IN SIGHT. Poor abused friend, to his credit he still hangs with us when he can.

2nd case While in the mall for family day... The local 4 H is having a petting zoo. As The princess is oooing and aahhhing and petting the bunnies, Zig leans over and whispers loud enough for the handlers to hear, "bunnies taste like chicken". Oh! the horror on The Princess's face!. Oddly enough the handlers never blinked.

Later, at the same event... He convinced The Princess that LLamas are carnivours and particularly like fingers. This lead to an all day discussion on llamas including the Short Man's proclaimation that Zig is O.W.L. "obesessed with llamas". Part of the discussion included Zig asking The Short Man if he knew the band "BananaLlama".... too which The Short Man replied "yes". proof is here..... at zigs blog.Please take special note of his discussion with The Princess at the end.

IN THE SAME DAY....... While at the dinner table Zig turns to The Princess and in all seriousness says..."I can read you mind and I can prove it"..... she is mesmerized.... he says urgently, "QUICKLY, give me a number between 1 and 3" and before she can say anything he says dramaticly "2!"..... she was awestruck until she realized 2 really the only whole number option......In all seriousness he has been saving that one for years, to use at just the right time. I'd tell you about his favorite knock knock joke but it doesnt play well in type.......

So please vote for my favorite dork at if theses stories dont win you over than at least learn about his friend Argyle in his submission at the link Zigs Dork Entry. Thank you for your support. Vote Here.

Friday, April 20, 2007

da count

I had specifics for this weeks Da Count but now I forget.

SO...... I am thankfull for relavtively decent health, kids so smart as to actually be a challenge to raise, renters, a job I usually am exicited to go to, the newly green leaves, more food than I could possible eat, but mostly for a spouse that loves me even when he is angry with me, a spouse that defends my sleep from sleep predators, a spouse that enjoys camping with my family, a spouse who still wants to spend time with me.

thats the short version.

hugs and happy weekend.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

ITS TUESDAY! YA ! more revelations......

TMI Tuesday #79

1. My biggest sexual turnoff is __________?

ummmmmm animals? under legal conseting age or blatant manipulation of someone with no or poor references to make informed decisions? extreme pain? I'm sure there is more... I just can't think now oh thought of one more... a quick trigger guy with not enough brains to help me get off... dude I dont care if you got off as soon as you got in... its almost a compliment... but I believe God gave you a tongue and fingers for a reason and that reason is ME! :)

2. Do you prefer natural tastes or flavored lubes?

Do I have to choose? I like vareity! give me both! anyone ever try that spray liquid sour candie? Altoids? POProcks? popsicles? or the ZigHOuse personal favorite LISTERENE BREATH STRIPS!!!!!!!!!!...oh baby.... tingle and flavor.... Flavored condoms still tastes like latex but at least it makes Bjs more interesting because without his scent its kinda lame. I do have this product called Ex-c-TEE that is orange dreamish from a company called True Romance. that tingles too..... damn I did it again TMI HUH?

3. How much money would it take to convince you to get on stage naked?

question is.... How much money would YOU spend to see my naked on stage.... lets negotiate...*smirk* oh and I accept large gifts with appreciating value too...

4. Have you ever been to an AA meeting or similar support group meeting?

no, and they dont want to come to camp either....

5. Do you wear socks to bed? Is that okay or totally unsexy?

Yes, often I have cold feet, thankfully MrZig is tolerant. I try to make them clean and matching... but I digress. As for unsexy, how can you have fun with cold feet? if socks would help him pay attention to me and get his groove on then double up baby its goign to be a long night!

Bonus (as in optional): Ever been arrested? Turned someone in/had someone arrested?

Only picture that state or county has of me is on my drivers liscence... as far as someone else..... maybe... I once followed a widely weaving 25to 40 in a 55 mph zone driver 5 miles because I was to scared to pass. I got to work and called with all the details. If you are that blatanly intoxicated whether alcohol, pot or prescription then you dont deserve to drive.


Friday, April 13, 2007

Da Count for Friday the Thirteenth

Talking The Princess on a impromtu walk and having her lead.... We skipped.
Btw way.. if you havent skipped lately give it a go... great exercise... and if you dont feel better afterwards then your just a party pooper anyways......... I am sure it was a sight for the highway travelers. My coat open, my D cups boingidity boiggidity boinging... under my top in a bra not made for skipping.... (I sure hope they were watching me and not her, not because I am an attention whore but..... ... she is only 10. Those pediphile pervs really piss me off.)

The Princess's hand in my own. Her hand is larger now. And shapped just like mine, complete with crooked little finger. My heart grows a bit everytime I get the opportunity to cradle her hand in my own.

My Princess requesting a scrub top to wear to career day. She is so proud of her mom. I left her my stethscope too. Bonus dropping them off at the school with the fireman and Police K 9 unit roaming the halls in uniform (insert drooling here).

I am greatefull for a spouse that lets me sleep when I need it. I was up for more than 24 hours again. Some of it scheduling.. some of it just bizarre no sleep bullshit. adendum... I am also gratefull that same spouse can look me straight in my googly eyes and say "Go to bed now, your getting silly." Of course, he adores my stubborn ass staying up another 15 minutes just to prove that he does not have to send me to bed for my own good.....wait... maybe that is a good thing.(insert evil grin here)

I am gratefull for Michigan weather and seasons even though we are a bit tired of snow this year... I see spring all around and it makes me all fuzzy and warm inside.

Books from a memory long ago....and a man who does not forget.

Local produce....ya for summer.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

tmi #78

TMI Tuesday #78

1. Stubble... good or bad? How often do you shave?

I am weird.... I realy dont care what my man does with his face except for the Osama Bin Laden look....(not to MrZig, this look is never to be revisited) as long as there is some type of occasional maintainence I am happy. and stubble is damn sexy on the right man, all time favorite.... Goatees... I am not sure why but a goateed face will always get a second look from me.... plus I like the particular advatages of a little facial hair (see bonus question).... but I digress..

2. How often do you kiss (read make out) with your so?

The goal is daily, but sometimes things like proximity and schedules get in the way.

3. Have you ever placed a personal ad or answered a personal ad?

no and no. But I have noticed the stigma for personal ads is resolving..lots of more or less normal people do so now, its not just for the desparate or perverse.. or
perversly desparate... again I digress...

4. Where was the first place you ever had sex?

Behind the hotel, behind some bushes on his coat. I am going to stop there.

5. After a night of great sex, who do you tell? How much?

Depends...somedays I'll tell who ever will listen.... and all the details...other days I keep it to myself... the secret kinda feels like wearing lingerie under a business suit. Mostly importanly though I make a point to tell my spouse. I think good deeds should be rewarded... particulary with more good deeds.

Bonus (as in optional): Have you ever kissed your partner on the lips after oral sex without brushing teeth, nor washing/gargling/rinsing out mouth? Turn on or off

I try to establish this as acceptable behaviour or not early in a relationship... if he is into so am I... if not... I can play nice. As for me, I love to kiss him after he has been tongue tickling my nether regions. I mean seriously,if I thought it was that gross how could I expect him to go there? Sometimes the next morning I can still smell sex on his beard. Hot. Very Hot. makes wet all over again.

Sunday, April 08, 2007

Happy Easter.

I miss my family. Both my immediate family and those more distant. I helped sick people get better instead of watching my kids inhale vast amounts of sugar infused treats, instead of dinner with relatives, instead of hiding eggs.

These holidays are odd for me. I miss the big family gatherings. I miss the special treats reseverd for family get togethers. I miss seeing faces and hugging people not usually associated with my day to day life. I miss the fights and the laughter and the sence of belonging.

My family is in transition. I havent quite caught up with the idea. My Aunts and Uncles who used to be my core are now distant. They have grandkids now.

I fit somewhere in between.

I am kinda like the lost child.

I am not my Grandparents child but often at family events my Aunt will look me honestly and in the eye and say
"do you know what your "mother" did the other day...." It takes me a few sentences to realize she does not mean my mother, her sister, but actually is talking of her mother, my grandmother. Was that confusing? I am sorry. My Aunt is not the only one. My Grandmother has talked to me about my "sister".... My mother... her daughter..
My Uncles do it too. My youngest Uncle is 5 years older than me.

I am five years older then the next grandchild, and for the majority I am 10 years older or more. My uncles were having children about the same time I was. My daughter is the first Great grandchild. But it doesnt seem that way.

There is no Easter dinner this year. I work both the night before and night of Easter, not much time for preparing much of anything... and my child is 1/2 state away. I am hoping she will be home today, weather permitting.

Gotta love Spring in Michigan. The daffodils have bloomed but succumbed to the snow and wind. Green grass pokes through a fluffy blanket of snow. I guees that is kinda how I feel to day. Like a season looking forward to warmer weather but not quite giving up on winters icy grip.

I suppose that is enough rambling this morning.

My Easter wish is for my family to know deep in there soul how much I care. I wish the best for yours too.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

TMI..... Lets play...

TMI Tuesday #77

1. What is your middle name?

I was blessed with my mothers first name and my great grandmothers first name is my middle one. I am honored, though I struggle to remember the delicate woman who smelled like ben gay. My great grandpa doted on her every whim. Although frail appearing the woman had a commanding voice when she saw fit to use it. I was a teenager before I realized some families choose middle names at random. In my family it is usually a friend or relative. A place of honor.

2. Where do you keep your toys? In your nightstand?

nightstand .......but payday this week I am getting a lock box. Long story I dont care to discuss now.

3. How many toys do you have? List them! (links & pictures are nice, too!) =P
does each finger count? do each of his fingers?... and his tongue? penis ? and thigh? and... damn i have a lot of toys.... oh and I do have one with bells and whistles (not really bells and whistles but i bet somewhere there is video clip of a whistling pussy)lol

4. Are you a swinger? Ever wanted to be?

no, yes.

5. When should parents sit children down for the "birds & bees" talk?

sit down? *shock and horror look*
sex ed starts as soon as kids can touch them selves and talk. Proper name for body parts without guilt, corralling self touching to acceptable private areas without guilt, talking about what they hear and see by the media, discussing what is going to happen to tween bodies before it starts happen....answering questions about babies and mommies and daddies in a real but age appropriate way then building on those discussions.

Bonus (as in optional): Do you know how many sex offenders are in your city? Find out & tell me. (click here!)

I tried this in several ways I couldnt get there. But life has taught me.... people interesting in the very young or socially unacceptable are everywhere.... list or never know.

Monday, April 02, 2007

My memory filled weekend.....and blushing.......

So we have relinquished the cabin to renters. They have done great stuff with the house but I will miss it. I went this weekend to clean out stuff. Mostly my dads stuff that I could not deal with after the funeral in November of last year. It was painfull.

Many memories later I am home with more stuff I dont quite know what I should do with it. Except the albums. Mostly from the 70's and 80's. I still have not counted them all, but I did eyeball each and every cover. Some are of little notice, but the cover art work on others flooded my head and heart and eyes.

One of particular note is Derringer. If you are familar with Derringer then the one in particular I am fond of is the one red and white target and handgun on the cover. "If I weren't so romatic, I'd shoot you." Funny, the song was just silly and fun when I was 10, now it has many more levels. I guess experience does that to you. I can hardly wait to get all albums to digital.

Dads compound bow needs some work. Cool thing.... I can actually pull it back now. Apparently I have gained some muscle since 13. I have considered archery before, maybe now is the time.

Pictures, pictures, pictures, pictures. Again, hard to get through, too many feelings, too soon. I have eyeballed them all, just haven't sorted them. The square pics from the 70's are definetly showing some signs of aging. The color is degrading to some reddish hue. The earlier black and whites are still sharp though. Hopefully I can save our families memories to digital too.

On a funnier note:

I called my younger cousin old this weekend. When we arrived at the house he was sweeping the loose stones off driveway. I rarely see him anymore so a hug was in order, along with the comment "Your getting old, (weird look from him) old men sweep driveways." to which he laughed and smiled. Poor lad has been domesticated. But it was evil satisfaction for me to see his expanding waist line. And while typing this I realized he laughs like our Uncle Tim, 2 days later I finally nailed that one down.

... At the post office I overheard a conversation between a lady in her 60's and a lady in her 70's. I know this because it came up in their conversations. But what made me chuckle was their vernacular. These two well dressed older women tossed around words like asshole and bitch like teenagers learning to use cuss words for the first time. I would have blushed, but.... well ya know... I dont blush much these days.

And I miss Steve. Steve made me laugh. and sometimes cringe, but mostly laugh. I wish him and his important people well in health, wealth and love.